so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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