Me too!
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize