I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
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