the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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