guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Randomize
