Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
we should paint friendship bongs
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