I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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