there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
