You were right. It hurts to walk today.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Randomize
