Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
She bit a glass in half.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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