Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
