I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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