dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
