no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
