oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
