Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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