If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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