my mouth tastes like poor choices
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
