The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize