Need sex. Gaining weight.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
