Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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