I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
