I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize