So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I had to cum in my sink.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
