Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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