She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
