Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
