he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
birth control should be required to get into college
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize