32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
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