week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
