Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize