You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
