3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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