i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
