in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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