do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
