is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
