Got a toothbrush?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
