I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
