she woke up with a sticky ear
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I love you. Go after that dick
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
