I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
