Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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