I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
