Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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