Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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