8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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