i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
