I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
