Dual....:-)
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
