He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
