Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
