the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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